You see, we are going to be grandparents soon....for the FIRST TIME. Anticipation is killing me.
But, my Dad will not be here to witness my new role in life. That's what has me down. I was used to being a kid in his presence, no matter what age I was. Taking on a new role in life was something that I always shared with him.
First day of school.....shared it with him
First bike ride...shared it with him
First tree I climbed....shared it with him
First prize ribbon in a science project fair....shared it with him
First time behind the wheel of a car (at the age of 11)....shared it with him
First time getting an official driver's license...shared it with him
First time graduating from high school and college....shared it with him
First time getting married....shared it with him
First time becoming a parent....shared it with him
But now, my new role....First time becoming a grandmother.....he's not here to share it with me. That's what hurts. If he were here, I know what would happen. Just like all the Firsts that I mentioned above, he would give me a big hug, tell me that he was proud of me, and smile from ear to ear.
So, this First time becoming a grandmother, I will just have to imagine his smile, imagine I feel him hug me tight, and imagine I hear him say, "Shari, I am proud of you".
I think I'll need a tissue now. You might need one, too, if your Dad is not here with you on this Father's Day. God Bless all the Dads who have gone onto Heaven. May they all have the blessings and peace that they so deserve.
|Frank J. Bognar, Jr. 1925-2002|